Can such hearts love?

1. Everyone is wicked from the womb:

Who are the wicked according to the Lord?

“For there is not a just man upon earth, that doeth good, and sinneth not.” (Ecclesiastes 7:20)
“But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.” (Isaiah 64:6)
“They are all gone aside, they are all together become filthy: there is none that doeth good, no, not one.” (Psalms 14:3)
“As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one. Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips: Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness: Their feet are swift to shed blood: Destruction and misery are in their ways: And the way of peace have they not known: There is no fear of God before their eyes. Now we know that what things soever the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God.” (Romans 3:10-19)

Does God think that people have good hearts?

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9)
“Indeed, man's heart is one of the most loathsome and polluted things in God's universe!” (‘The Bitterness of Sin!’ by James Smith, 1860)
Can such a heart love? Does it even know what love is? As James Smith further notes ('God's Remedy for Man's Malady', 1849) the disease of sin is rooted in the heart:

This malignant disease has spread over every faculty of the soul!
The understanding is darkened — so that you cannot see your dreadful state!
The conscience is defiled — and neglects its vital office!
The will is powerfully biased to evil — and chooses what God abhors!
The affections are earth-bound — and set on forbidden things!
The imagination is become sensual — and only employed in evil!
The reason is debased — and calls darkness, light; and light, darkness!
The memory is captivated, and become a storehouse of iniquity!
The whole soul is paralyzed, polluted, and diseased!
Righteousness, before the fall, once lodged in it — but now murderers reside there!
Satan has got possession — and endeavors to lead you to hell in a false peace!

Why is everyone looking for inner peace?

“There is no peace, saith the LORD, unto the wicked.” (Isaiah 48:22)

So, God considers all people wicked and evil (Matthew 7:11) “and God is angry with the wicked every day” (Psalms 7:11b) and “the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth” (Psalms 11:5b).

2. Not only is everyone wicked from the womb, but everyone is also born dead:

Humans are born with live bodies, but dead souls.

“But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.” (Genesis 2:17)
Adam and Eve’s souls died that day and each one of us inherits a dead soul.

God considers everyone to be wicked and “dead in trespasses and sins” (Ephesians 2:1b) and “The wicked are estranged from the womb: they go astray as soon as they be born, speaking lies” (Psalms 58:3).

3. Therefore everyone is wicked from the womb and born dead, resulting in everyone's way being upside down:

Now, there are two ‘ways’ described throughout the Bible—the “way of the wicked” and “the way of the righteous”:

The way of the wicked goes down to the pit. “The way of the wicked is as darkness” (Proverbs 4:19). “The wicked shall be turned into hell, and all the nations that forget God.” (Psalms 9:17) “The way of the wicked is an abomination unto the LORD” (Pr 15:9a). When the wicked get to the end of their way they will be burned up, cut off, and destroyed (Psalms 106:18b, Psalms 37:38b, Psalms 145:20b).

“...the way of the wicked [the LORD] turneth upside down.” (Psalms 146:9)

Now, think about the implications… this means that this world, our actions, our thoughts, our feelings, our wants, our likes/dislikes, EVERYTHING is upside down!

We think that we are good; we are wicked and evil.
We think that we are alive; we are dead.
We think that we will go to heaven; we are heading for hell.
We feel like we will live forever; we will die in a few short years.
We pamper and emphasize taking care of our bodies that will die and rot; we ignore our souls that will live forever tormented in hell.
We frantically gather treasures on earth (which will rust and which we can not take with us) and chase bubbles; we neglect to gather treasures in heaven.
We want to be happy; we don’t want to be holy (which is the only way to true happiness).
We have eyes for the things of this world that perish; we have no vision for the invisible things that will remain.
We have ears to hear the passing noise of this world; we have no ears to hear God’s voice.
We have feet that run swiftly to destruction; we have palsied / paralyzed feet for God’s way.
We have voices that speak lies and vanities; not the things of the Lord.
We have taste buds for the food that perisheth feeding our stomachs; we have no taste for the Bread of Life Who would feed our souls.
We are thirsty for water; but not for living Water
We have feelings for things of this earth; no love of God.
We are worried about tomorrow; not worried about eternity.
We are worried about dying; not about dying forever.
We fear men and the devil; we have no fear of God.
We are satisfied with knowing about the Lord; we don’t want to know Him personally and experientially.
We think that trials, tribulations and sorrows are horrible events as they don’t allow us to enjoy life; we don’t realize that they can be blessings that can bring a person to God, and tear him away from this world, and prepare him for eternity.
We emphasize trifles and labour for the bread that perisheth, spending our time and energy on useless things; we ignore the things of lasting value and importance and working on things that will last.
A woman’s outer beauty is valued; inner beauty is of little value.
A man’s bodily strength is valued; strength of character is of little value.
We exalt the ‘cool’ rebel; we despise the holy.
We love what God hates; we hate what God loves.
We call evil good; and good evil.
We like to read every book; but the Bible.
We are eager to read fairytales; but ignore true revelation.
We kill the unborn; and give our children to strangers to raise; we ignore that children are a blessing and are to be nurtured and taught by their mothers.
We value personal fulfillment; and ignore family.
We believe that the best a woman can achieve is ‘equality’ and this means that she must act like a man; we ignore that in God’s eyes women are equal and have their own distinct role.
We look at appearances; God looks at the heart.

So, do you really think that a dead, wicked, heart of stone can know/feel love (which is a fruit of the Spirit [Galations 5:22]?

How could I love (Biblically) when my affections are upside down and set on forbidden things? When my imagination is depraved, filthy and sensual? Can a pretend new heart - gained by following the 4 step plan of salvation - squeeze out a little of the love of 1Corinthians 13? If we are honest with ourselves, isn't the love of 1Corinithians 13 completely alien to our hearts: unattainable and unachievable and unfelt? We can pay lip service to it and quote it with pious looking faces and muster up a little bit of it occasionally and pretend 'love' in certain situations; but if we are honest, lust and selfishness and appearances is what we call 'love':

Does she fit with my life and my goals? What will he do for me? Will she make me happy? Will he take care of me? Will she fulfill my needs, wants, and desires? Will he be my knight in shining armour who saves me? I want someone fun to play the game of life with; someone who shares my interests/hobbies. I can't wait any longer. I want a family. I want the best person for me. I want somebody to rescue me from being alone. I want somebody to show off to others. I want it now. I, I, I, and me, me, me. Professing 'christians' in today's churches cloak all of this lust/selfishness with some lovely christian vocabulary and phrases and teachings and 'how-to' instructions for singles and couples; however, the stark reality is that unregenerate hearts cannot know love. We need a cure at a heart level. Futhermore, if we are honest we acknowledge that by nature we are in love with Satan's image (he is our father after all - John 8:44) in others: 'cool'ness, rebellion, pride, worldy success... Even our concept of 'beauty' is upside down.

As a man do you have any idea how to become like 'Christ to the church' and to love a wife; and as a woman, do you have any idea how to be a Proverbs 31 helpmeet who reverences her husband? Since love is a fruit of the Spirit (Galations 5:22), without a 'heart of flesh' to replace the 'heart of stone', our wicked hearts cannot find/feel love, since true (Biblical) love is a completely alien concept to a wicked, dead heart of stone.

How can I trust such a wicked and dead heart to lead me to the right person? into marriage?

How many people think to seek first the kingdom of God in their souls? ("But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33); "For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power." (1 Corinthians 4:20) "for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you." (Luke 17:21b). The Holy Spirit has to become an experienced and felt possession who comes in power to my soul and gives me a new heart of flesh. Just as the body has senses; the soul/heart has spiritual eyes, ears, feelings... These need to be opened and made alive. "A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh." (Ezekiel 36:26) (Have you ever felt your heart of stone? If not, you have never had a broken and contrite heart and you cannot be born again.)

After that, walking in obedience in Love, in the steps of the persecuted church, having forsaken everyone and everything (as Biblical), and myself also (Matthew 10:38), a pilgrim; the Lord might bring a fellow pilgrim into my life. (Since there are precious few such people around, even meeting one nowadays in North America is a miracle!) And my interest will be in the person's heart/soul. Is s/he spiritually alive? Can I see the Holy Spirit looking out of his/her eyes? Are we going towards the same place, regardless of the cost? There is nothing more beautiful than a heart genuinely in love with the Lord. It transforms the whole body, making it beautiful (to a fellow pilgirm) regardless of age or features. (Oh that I might be one of these people!) And we can then hold hands, set our faces, and fight the good fight of faith and run the race through the inevitable sorrows, trials, temptations, and tribulations as we watch eachother get older and uglier, shrivel up and get weak and sick and die. And we can love eachother's heart with God's love as we see His image formed more and more in eachother. And the marriage will reflect the Bible and we will meet victorious in the Lord Jesus Christ on the other side, for we "looked for a city which hath foundations, whose builder and maker is God." (Hebrews 11:10) Things turned right-side up! (From this perspective, does it really matter if s/he can play a certain sport, or eats chicken soup, or dislikes shopping???!!!)

4. Let’s see what going a way that is upside down means:

We pursue all the wrong things; value all of the wrong things; invest time / energy into all of the wrong things; and seek happiness in all of the wrong things. The things of this world, controlled by the Prince of this World, should appear to be ugly, useless, and vanity; instead they tantalize and entice us and we consider not that the “the end of those things is death” (Romans 6:21). We think that we are rational beings, but in reality we act as delusional madmen.

Proverbs 14:12: “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.”

J. R. Miller writes (in 1886): “To let men have what they want, would be to open the gates of ruin and death for them. What they hunger for, thinking it bread, is but a cold stone! The path that to their eyes seems to be strewn with flowers, and to lead to a paradise—is full of thorns, and leads to darkness and death. The things they crave and cry for, thinking to find sweet satisfaction in them, when gotten at last prove to be but bitter ashes!” (Silent Times, A Book to Help in Reading the Bible into Life)

The only way is to REPENT, turn around, seek, search, pray for a broken contrite heart, the fear of the Lord, read the Bible and start off and the Lord will lead you to the new birth (where your soul is made alive) and make you His child and lead you in the way everlasting, in the paths of peace, the way of the righteous.

Ezekiel 18:23: “Have I any pleasure at all that the wicked should die? saith the Lord GOD: and not that he should return from his ways, and live?”

Ezekiel 18:30-32: “Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, saith the Lord GOD. Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions; so iniquity shall not be your ruin. Cast away from you all your transgressions, whereby ye have transgressed; and make you a new heart and a new spirit: for why will ye die, O house of Israel? For I have no pleasure in the death of him that dieth, saith the Lord GOD: wherefore turn yourselves, and live ye.”

“Let no man deceive himself.” (1 Corinthians 3:18): The Bible doesn’t offer a ‘plan’ of salvation (like an insurance policy); but a “way of salvation” (Acts 16:17) which one must enter into through the Door (“Then said Jesus unto them again, Verily, verily, I say unto you, I am the door of the sheep.” [John 10:7]) the only possible Way (“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” [John 14:6]) and then “walk in it” (2 John 1:6) ; “Fight[ing] the good fight of faith” (1 Timothy 6:12) and “hold[ing] fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm unto the end.” (Hebrews 3:6).

It is every individual’s responsibility to study the Bible and pray for the Holy Spirit’s illumination of what he reads:

“[The Bereans] were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.” (Acts 17:11) God invites us personally: “Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD” (Isaiah 1:18).

Pray that God would convict you of your sins and your unrighteousness and of the judgment to come (John 16:8); and that you are lost and will perish.
Seek the Lord. (Matthew 6:33)
Pray for the “fear of the Lord”, as it “is the beginning of knowledge”. (Prov 1:7)
Pray to have your eyes and ears opened to God’s Truth. (Mark 8:18)
Pray that God would open the eyes of your understanding. (Luke 24:45)
Pray that you would see yourself as God sees you (dead in sin). (Ephesians 2:1)
Pray that God would make you hate sin and love holiness.
Pray to have a hunger and thirst for righteousness. (Matthew 5:6)
Pray for a “broken heart” and a “contrite spirit” (Psalm 34:18; 51:17)
Repent. Make a 180°. Turn from known sin in your life.
Pray with an obedient heart; pray for a willingness to obey.
Start obeying whatever the Lord shows you.
Pray for the gift of faith. (Ephesians 2:8)
Pray that God would make you a “new creature” (2 Cor 5:17)
Pray for the miracle of being “begotten of God” (‘born again’) (1 John 5:18)
Read God’s Word (the Bible) and ask the Lord to illuminate It for you and teach you in your heart.
And if you don't feel like it, set your will and seek the Lord anyway and pray that you would want to seek God and that the Lord would find you and that you would find the Lord Jesus Christ.

*all Scripture quotations from the KJV